In the very least, a gifted and talented adult should want control over the way their life unfolds. That requires projecting a persona that is both approachable and respected as a force “with which to be reckoned”. There's no sense waiting until adulthood to create that kind of public presence. That's another reason we are targeting the grade school age group with these ideas.
There are two strategic points to keep in mind when speaking to anyone. One, “Do I project authority?” Two, “Do I earn loyalty?”
The first point is relatively straight forward for a gifted or talented individual. It starts with sounding smart and articulate. But beyond that, you still have to make sense to the people within earshot. If people's eyes glaze over, you can't be authoritative: They have to understand you.
The second point is more difficult, but it's a skill that can be learned with practice. Do you conversations create positive relationships? This could be as casual as speaking kindly to a restaurant worker. It could be generating enthusiasm in a candidate you want to hire. It could be applying a pleasant form of persuasive pressure to get a fellow artist to swing your way on a major decision.
Like your words, there are two strategic points to consider when you operate on the public stage. One, “Do I get the big results?” Two, “Does my team win with me, or are my people injured by my actions?”
On the first point, this doesn't necessarily require you to have a track record leading successful teams. Especially when you're just getting started in life, getting big results as a solo performer will be adequate to generate interest and enthusiasm for your growing ambitions. The ability to generate results is the key. Most gifted and talented kids can point to a history of results.
The second point here maps directly to Point Number Two under “The Words” immediately to the left here. Loyalty is built on the practice of fairness. People who help you achieve big results should obtain their fair share of the rewards. This is not mere idealism. An emotional sense of fairness pervades all primate species, and an unfair leader often suffers the wrath of the troup. The sustainable strategy is always to take care of your people, be they team members, customers, or other types of supporters.
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Be the Boss by 12 will be a game changer for parents as well as gifted and talented kids. This ebook series will open up a deep level of collaboration within many families.
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Be the Boss by 12 is a series of ebooks designed to help any gifted and talented child grow into a successful adult. The gifted child can add the skills of leadership to other gifts and talents. Such kids can build social habits that make school a richer experience. In their futures, the powers of leadership enable the gifted child to engage future decision-makers on a peer-to-peer footing to negotiate great career paths and compensation.
Erik Lenderman: Hi folks. This is Erik Lenderman, back again with Dr. Tom Meylan, former NASA scientist and Ph.D. in astrophysics. Today we're talking about his new book, Be the Boss by 12, Volume Zero, Parents' Prep. This book is about preparing you as a parent for how to raise your gifted and talented kid. So today we're going to talk about Chapter Seven, “Building Our Public 'Boss Persona' by Building New Social Habits.” So, Tom, can you tell us a little bit more about a parent is going to learn from this book and this chapter how to train their kids in these leadership and social habits?
Thomas Meylan Ph.D.: All right! So, we're continuing to build on this whole habit formation, habit transformation concept. So, we've talked about discovering habits. We've talked about discovering them in ourselves to see, “Well, how do I really think about myself, and do I need to add something else to it?” We're suggesting that the child adds a notion of being the boss to this element. You know, not getting rid of anything. It's “adding to.” And then we have this notion where we're trying to build this boss persona internally.
Now, it's gotta start there, but if it doesn't extend into the rest of the world, you're just this kind of like self-identifying boss that's not engaged in things that are actually going on. So, we have to form habits in the people around us. We have to get them to get used to thinking of us as the boss. And that's not doing it the way we often think about ugly, nasty, mean, awful bosses at work. This comes about by being a positive force in this social group.
So, instead of being like the big kid on the playground, and just beating people up until they do what you want, you actually become a problem solver in some sense, or maybe even in an outright practical sense. If it turns out that your gifted and talented child is a math whiz, and half of his friends wants to do math better and get better grades, this child starts their own little tutoring thing after school. They're the boss.
So, this ability to project this persona with enough persuasive power that the rest of the gang actually...“Yeah, that's the boss.” That's where this chapter is going. So, it's great to feel great about yourself. Gotta start there. You think of yourself as the boss, the person with the gifts or the talents to run things well. But then the rest of the group has to see that, and buy into that as well. So, it's the formation of that social habit that forms that kind of a network between the gifted and talented child and the rest of the class, and forms that networked team. So, that's where we're going at here.
Erik Lenderman: That's great, that's great. So, folks, if you want to learn to provide your gifted and talented kid with these kinds of skills so they can build upon a reservior of self-identity and skills to be leaders in the world, click the link below. Get a copy of Tom's book. And stay tuned. We're going to come back with some more chapters. I think we have one more chapter to go, and then you guys can go ahead and get a copy of the book now, and click the link below, and we'll be back in just a moment.
Raising a child is not easy. If you have a gifted and talented child, it's an even bigger challenge. Many of them grow up without much support to realize the full potential of their unique abilities. Dr. Thomas Meylan, through his book series has done a masterful job of giving parents and gifted kids real, usable tools to succeed in life. Leadership is generally not an emphasis in traditional schools. This is a must read for parents, educators, psychologists, and others who care for the gifted and talented. Bharat Chitnavis, CEO VitalStatistix Inc., CO-Founder Gifted and Talented Network (LinkedIn), and parent of a gifted girl who started college at 13
The gifts will mostly take care of themselves.
Build emotional toughness
into the child's inner dialog.
Teach the child to project
the social cues of "The Boss."